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Friday, July 28, 2017

Trail Blazers & One Power: A Letter

Our healing is for the whole world, because the world is our Self. Many people are going through so much heavy darkness right now, but the hidden movement of us trail blazers -- we who go through it Knowingly as an Awakening process -- are assisting the clearing of the illusion instead of its perpetuating, which helps the whole.  This "householder" had a big dose recently.  

Truth will not spare the illusion...It will do anything to wake us up, and when we come to sanity, we always see the "hell" was created by the mind. The medicine sent is exposing it so it can dissipate in Awareness like mist in the morning sun.  It is a mistake that can slow things down and leave us spinning in unproductive cul-de-sacs of guilt, however, if we make it personal. As in "why is my mind creating this awful world/sickness/problem?!  After 20 years on the path?  I  am a failure!" 

We feel as though it is "my" mind and "my" life, however, there is no person. We are the Self viewing from an aspect and clearing layers assigned to us that have collected for eons.

Those of us knowingly using the world for this purpose will always have what we need to turbo charge the process (i.e. the Miracle) and reduce or eliminate pain and suffering. This includes friends who are really "mighty companions" as The Course in Miracles says who Know.  Whether just in form or not, there are always those who will join with us, at our invitation, to remember the Truth while we temporarily let 'r rip.  

Awakening is essentially a destructive process (from the individual self's point of view), and therefore often messy. (aka "healing is not for sissies.")  We can remember that no matter what "problem" faces us, everything is unfolding as it should and All is Well.  All is Well, because there is only One Power.  As we heal, we are the trail blazers for those around us. Just our Presence is often all that is needed, and certainly it is all that ever heals or "teaches."   

I wanted to share the letter I wrote (names have been removed) that shares a bit more on how all these lessons were reinforced in me.

* * * 
Dear D and M....

I don't think I can write all there is to share with you, and what a happy gift it is to know there's no need...I will be seeing you soon. The need was filled before it was even identified...Sweet Amazing Grace.

In short -- the last 48 hours have been miraculous. They included both conversation with D on the phone, then a miraculous email from MS.  It was 2:30 am my time and after 5 hours of enduring something being "exhumed" from my body (felt as burning and dry heaving) mind and soul, I finally got on my knees and asked for Help.  Within 2 minutes, an angel named M sent me a heart-filled email of support (out of "nowhere") and an invitation to join.  Immediately, the relief began....and I poured out a few words about the "hell" that seemed to be stuck in me.  After sharing that with her, the rest dissipated entirely.  As I was drifting off to sleep -- melting into it, was like something in my DNA had been exorcised and I felt my body like Light -- I heard the lesson that was underlying ALL the others:  There is only One Power.

This feels like the lynch pin that has been waiting to be revealed/accepted, because touching on that one has started the collapsing of all the other grievances, fears, body thoughts/identification, and "problems."  Issues that I have worked hard to fully forgive for years have completely shifted and the pain  in each has been replaced with new appreciation and understanding for what is really happening.  Some of it has been so spontaneous --- no thought, then suddenly a great "aha!" about an issue I hadn't thought about in ages.  

It's like a massive clean up happening.

And to close the circle, I just got a beautiful, miraculous follow up from M responding to my "morning after thoughts" where I thanked her again and shared what had happened.  Incredibly One Power has been her intention/lesson that she's been focusing on putting into practice.  She also shared that seeing the lesson witnessed through me became a helpful re-enforcer for her yesterday dealing with a dear friend and colleague who experienced a life/death situation within the last 24 hours.  And of course this just re-enforces the Lesson here in me yet again...

It's like a momentum is building in Consciousness that cannot and will not be stopped.  The One Power is being revealed and in that the dream will fade.

Eight years ago I had many weird things start happening as my own awakening kicked fully into gear.  The channeling of a group who go by "the Brothers" was one chapter, and during the spontaneous first session we were told we were "trail blazers."  Two days later I got an email from someone about a painting I'd bought a year earlier that was never shipped to me.  Somehow I had forgotten about it completely even though it was $125 or something...when she sent it to me, the title was "Blazing a trail."  I was being cooked for sure, because this was all too outside what my mind could handle.  (I have attached a picture of it -- a girl walking through the dark, towards the pure Light of Oneness...letting all the symbols go behind her.)  Later, I saw <teacher> speak for the first time, and he started saying things the Brothers had said verbatim (and they always spoke in a unique way).  "Reality" became very disorienting, but I started to say yes to the free fall...and the rest is history.

I'm sharing this with you both because, at the risk of seeming to support or encourage belief in the "world drama" which ego loves, I do think there is something changing right now or speeding up.  You two are also part of my "trail blazer" tribe, of course.  I just join you in the joy of being knowingly who we are.

"Hell" is a great motivator and perhaps many will be experiencing even more suffering. We mothers know, there's a point during childbirth where we want to do anything to escape the pain (if we are not in full Trust that all is well), and yet beyond a certain point, there's nothing that can be done but let go. Maybe collectively we are moving into something like this...and who knows what appearances may turn up....

But the eye of the hurricane is a safe place and always available when we're clear about One Power behind all appearances...and that All is Well.

So I don't pretend to know what is happening "out there' in the world.  I just feel the Call to join and to be Knowingly our One Power.  Believing we are separate is just a bad habit we can kick...our Presence as "householders" in the world of families and jobs, etc. is even more challenging than living as monks but we are in our Right Place for what is required.

As far as the story of Laura and T, everything seen here in me was also felt "there" in him, and he had a huge release, as well.  Some was conscious and a lot was more deep, but as we talk and tease things out, there's even more change and Lightness coming through in him that looks like youth and his endearing natural state of humor. We met last night but the miracle had already done its work in us both, and while there was lots of sharing, there were no real problems to sort.  In fact, we burst out laughing when we first saw each other.  We sat near a St. Francis statue at Saint Mary's (ha!) and then split a hamburger.  By the end of the meal, it was clear we should move swiftly to get him out of -- of all places -- the Circus Circus.  (double Ha!) Circus, indeed!!  We walked with new eyes through the symbols around us:  scary clown pictures, casino gambling machines, stale cigarette smoke filled air, wild mesmerizing carpets that were grungy if you looked close, and lots of sleep walkers.  

Then we looked up and there was a huge genie staring at us with a sign that said "Choose Wisely!"

HAHAHAHA  Roger, that!

Thank you, bless you, and know we both have deep love for you all -- R and Mr. A included....

Monday, July 24, 2017

Where is my wanting?

The masters tell us again and again that the Truth is so easy we miss it.  We miss who We Already Are, because we are wanting what we are not.

Today, can I be the reversal? Instead of sending my wanting out, can I gently look inward to see where my wanting is and call it Home?  Just the honest looking inward and seeing without judgment (True Forgiveness) is all that is needed.

Desire is splintered into fragments of wanting which play out in situations and relationships in our worlds. Beneath the obvious situation at hand, there are core desires: wanting approval/admiration from ourselves and others; wanting control of myself, my environment, and others; wanting my security, both emotionally and physically; and wanting a separate special status.

As we live our lives and find ourselves reacting or judging or feeling depressed or "off" in some way, we can pause and just welcome these feelings.  If we're sad or frustrated or angry etc., we can ask ourselves -- what is it that I'm wanting right now?  We can take a moment to feel it all fully without rationalizing it (being right), spiritualizing it (using our intellect to judge it as part of a spiritual framework), or pushing it away in some other fashion.

As we do, a funny thing happens -- we notice that we are not these feelings.

Something changeless like space exists prior to them.   I Am.  The feelings are objects that come and go. They float through awareness, which is the intimate sense of me-ness without any other parameters.  As awareness, we can welcome them fully, then let them go.

There are no bad or good thoughts or feelings.  There is simply energy that arises.  The mind will often try to analyse and find the "why" for them, but that's an old pattern that does not work to free us.  Instead, we can just fully welcome our "guests."  As we do, these energy forms can rest and dissolve.

Ultimately, the ego is a summation of this energy, but it is really all God, wanting to come Home or be released.  We come to find out we are the guru we've been looking for.  Realization is a do-it-yourself job, as Lester Levenson said.

Body identification (physical and psychological) is a strong, old habit, but that's all. As I practice welcoming all the images and feelings that arise, it weakens.  I can begin to watch this body like I watch other I am watching a dream or a movie.

From this neutrality, the Truth naturally shines.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

Lester Levenson - The Freedom State

This morning, I'm struck with a great gratitude at how blessed we are that in this age we have so much access, via online media, to so many different messages -- and messengers -- that have been pointing us towards the Truth within. Those of us on the Path are never without inspiration and guidance.  When we cannot hear the Voice within, we can type a few keystrokes into Google and get ready access to many masters whose lives were used to extend the Truth.

I have found Lester Levenson to be an amazingly clear channel.  An engineer in New Jersey, Lester was sent home to die by his doctor in 1952 after a massive coronary. His misery led to a sudden single-mindedness in his search within for Truth, and in a very short time, he awakened to the true Self. His awakening led him to dedicate his life to serving others, and in his messages you can hear the same messages you'll find in A Course in Miracles and Advaita....the deepest non-dual principles are expressed in a very clear, simple way with gentle guidance (and strong urging!) on how to apply it to our lives.

Please enjoy this talk from 1984, which I think is a good introduction to his teaching. 

For more, you can check the link I've added to my blog under Helpful Links, which is a collection of Lester's talks dating from the mid-1960's and later.

Monday, July 17, 2017

Lean In....

What is upsetting you?  What is it that is not going "your" way?  What is disappointing you, threatening you, scaring you, angering you, boring you?

I can only write to my Self.  So, Self, let's look tenderly here.

If I want to find sore spots in this one, places "I" am holding a judgement for or against, it's not hard.  I can think about a conversation with a family member.  Or I can simply scan the Daily News headlines.  "That's outrageous! So cruel! How unfair! What are they thinking?!"...etc.

Okay, there it is...the little or not-so-little upset. The "I" is asserting is the hero (tragic or otherwise) in its own endless story.

For a moment, do not react. As the Course in Miracles says, "Let all things be exactly as they are."

Reaction comes from conditioning.  It's the software program of the ego. It's the madness expressing and it always leads to more madness. We think, therefore we are somebodies. Somebodies must take a position on the "out there" in order to maintain an illusory constancy of separate existence.  I exist -- different from That, different from you -- because I judge.

Instead, just for a moment, be Still.  Do nothing.  Watch.  And next...lean in.

Lean in?  Yes, get closer.  Quietly, the Heart comes has questions that the ego can not answer.

What is this all about? What meaning have I given this?  Where, in fact, is all of this occurring?  What is the big story that this situation only thinly veils? Is it true? Can I be absolutely sure it's true? Is the opposite as true?

I am always experiencing my own consciousness. That's where it all happens.  I am upset, therefore, about a story I am telling myself.  The story is always somehow at some level about me.  But it is all made up by mind.  It is just thoughts, and when you/I sleep, we forget them and they are gone.  It only has the validity we give it every moment.  The Course reminds us it is actually exhausting to have to reinforce these beliefs every day!   It is the "I" thought that is mixed with these beliefs.  They reinforce each other. The experiencer is hit with so-called evidence continually throughout the day that they -- and it --- are true.

 This story, Reader, is our favorite book we read for eons.  Until it's not.  Until we see all we've ever been is Awareness.  Non-judging Awareness.  Self.  Consciousness.  The rest was unstable arbitrary content and positions for/against said arbitrary content.

Working towards awakening implies the false self is real...which is why egos love spiritual journeys. There is no struggle in this...just let us be honest in our Looking.    We don't have to get to where and what we already Are.  That's what Ramana was telling us and still is.  

Lean in and laugh at the free now! :)

Sunday, July 16, 2017

William Samuel - The Mirror of Self

Excerpt from William Samuel's book The Awareness of Self-Discovery:

"Every teacher, book, writer, practitioner, sage, guru or peanut vendor, by whatever name, title or label he goes, is an aspect of the Awareness (Identity) 'we' are. We take the book from the shelf most likely to render a specific service at a given moment. Exactly so, we have appeared to go to the philosophy, teacher, church, friend, stranger or peanut vendor that has unfolded as sufficient for the moment— but that philosophy, teacher, church, friend or stranger is within the awareness we are. So is the peanut vendor. We are forever looking at our Self.

"Now, listen softly: Just as one goes to the cleanest mirror in the house, the one that is the least distorted and best illuminated, so we turn to that aspect of the SELF that tells it to us 'like it is,' without mental reservation, without the absence of Light, and for absolutely certain, without making something of ITSELF by belittling others. What is seen 'out there' is a mirrored Self-image, but only an IMAGE. The awareness that is the looking is the divine, pure and sinless Identity we are. To say this again: The image-form that appears at any given moment is only one of an infinite number of forms that may appear. The value is not in the image. (Nor is the power!) The value is forever in the AWARENESS -- 'you'— are who is the observing of the image.

"All that could be called Samuel or any other name is only an infinitesimal aspect of the Self's tangible declaration— and tangibility is only part of it. There is the intangible That 'which is above them all'— the Deific Self-hood which is being all there is to the external tangibility of 'form' or to the internal intangibility of imagery. All that is called the belief and dream of a material existence enters the scene upon the assumption of an identity that limits itself to the body-image. That one sees all other images as separate and apart from itself. That one calls himself the observer and is continually fighting a battle with his observed. In the sad comedy of proliferating complication that follows, observING (the awareness that resides as the center of it all) goes but barely noticed. However, observing awareness goes on being the Identity we are anyway, whether we are conscious of it or not, and all the trials and tribulations of the limited identity's experience serve to bring us to the consciousness of the greater Identity— the one that is real; the one that has never been guilty of ignorance or wrong doing or anything else!"

On Waking Up is back: A New Beginning

I started sharing ideas at On Waking Up in 2010, almost 7 years ago now. Prior to that I'd studied A Course in Miracles for many years...